Month: October 2016

Hi guys, this is Val filling in as a guest writer for Marc. I apologize right off the bat because I am not as inspired a writer as Marc .Give me some data and numbers and I can rock  out a darn good lab report along with the best of ’em 🙂 Ask me to share my feelings-that’s a lot harder for me!

Today I had my last chemo treatment. To say that I had mixed feelings about it is an understatement. On one hand I had conquered this challenge that seemed insurmountable at the beginning of treatment. A week of being hospitalized right from the beginning, feeling lousy for 8 weeks, horrible panic attacks related to the chemo, appointments that seemed like they would never end. On the other hand, we have become close with our nurse and will really miss her. There was also a comfort in knowing that I would have someone checking on me weekly and knowing that the chemo was killing cancer cells. Are the cells all gone? I don’t know and that bothers me. My prayer to God is that by the end of radiation all of the cancer will be destroyed. I really want to see my kids grow up, graduate, get married, and have kids of their own. I really want to grow old with Marc. A lesson that God has been teaching me is to be grateful for the gift of each day I am given and to not worry or think too much about the future. This is probably a lesson that I will be working on for the rest of my life. I thank God for having me in the palm of His hand and being with me every step of the way. I am BLESSED!!

My wonderful husband set up a surprise last day of chemo shower. I started the morning with a friend surprising me in the waiting room with balloons and skin lotion. Then after I got settled in my cubicle and chemo was started, my nurse and several other nurses came around the corner with the most flowers, balloons, gifts and cards that I have ever seen! Another friend stopped by with a hug and a card. We needed a cart to get everything out to the car. One sad note; as we exited the building a gust of wind pulled on the balloons and knocked a vase off:-(  Thankfully we were able to rescue the flowers and someone was right there to sweep up the broken glass. When we got home someone had dropped off two sets of balloons and a vase of flowers for me. Tonight we were able to go out as a family and have a celebratory dinner! Even had someone buy us a dessert! To all of you who brightened my day today, thank you! I am BLESSED!

At home with all of my blessings.

Now what? As Marc mentioned in his post from yesterday, radiation is on the horizon in 2-3 weeks. I feel ready to get started ASAP. Time to move on and move forward! I should be done by the end of the year and then think about having more reconstructive surgery in the summer. Thank you to those of you who have been with my family and me on this journey. Thank you for the prayers. Thank you for the meals. Thank you for the cards and gifts. Thank you to the friend who cleaned my house, the friend who made soup weekly for me, the friend who is a cancer survivor and took me under her wing. Thank you to the friends who ran kids around when I couldn’t. Thank you to the people I am forgetting. A big thank you to my family. They have been my earthly rock and  I couldn’t have done it without them. Thank you to my Father God, my ultimate rock. I would not be here now without His strength, love, healing, and intervention in my life. I AM BLESSED!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This week has seen us with many doctor’s appointments as we transition from Val’s last chemo session tomorrow and onto the next steps of treatment.  We met early this week with the radiation oncologist to talk through the next treatment plan along with her on oncology doc to map out a long term follow up plan.

Val has an appointment next week where she will sit absolutely still for a very long time while they scan her body to map out the treatment area.  After that scan is complete, the doctors will go away and invest several hours in building the treatment plan to make sure that they radiate exactly where they want to and nowhere they don’t.  I like to think of it in terms that they will go and “engineer” the process.  She will also get some new tattoo’s that the team will use to line her up in the machine for treatment.  In my best Austin Powers voice, they will use a high intensity light source also known as a “laser” to line up the tattoos with the machine to make sure she is in exactly the same position for each treatment.

The actual radiation treatments are very short and probably only take 30 minutes from the time she enters the building to the time she exits.  She will get radiation treatment for 5 days a week and probably last 6 to 7 weeks.  The actual radiation treatments won’t begin for a few weeks yet while they let her recover from chemo a bit.  For side effects we have been told to expect her to be a bit fatigued and probably have some skin irritation where they radiate.

With much consulting, thought and prayer we have decided to forgo trying to get her expander put back in before starting radiation.  After talking with the docs to weigh the pros and cons, it seems best take the more conservative route and not introduce a process which may result in unnecessary complications.

The main goal is Val’s long term health by making sure all the cancer cells go bye, bye.  On the back end, Val will have a more extensive reconstructive surgery after waiting 6 months or so after radiation.  Our plastic surgeon is a very skilled doctor and if there was one person who we would want to do a more complex plastic surgery, he is it.

With Val’s last chemo treatment coming to and end tomorrow we have been told to expect it to be a bitter sweet time.  We are very excited to be done pumping poison, but have grown really attached to her oncology nurse and the entire oncology medical staff.  In some sense, we loose a little safety net with her not being seen weekly by this team.

On that note of medical team, Val’s breast surgeon, who we absolutely love and have not seen for several months called out of the blue yesterday to congratulate her on being done with chemo.  How cool is that!  A very busy doctor who we have not talked to in months, taking time out of her busy schedule to make a phone call to a patient!  It just goes to show you that very small things can mean an awful lot!

On the philosophical side, this transition to the next treatment phase brings about renewed thoughts of prognosis and what will happen in the future.  We have had our “heads down” plowing through chemo and now get a chance to come up for air a bit which allows a place for those thoughts to grow.

Val used to be very interested to know the percentages of this or that with a possible re-occurrence.  We had a good talk the other day about this subject and thinking through how we would live our life at two extremes.  The first extreme being that if we could know for positive that the cancer would return and the second extreme being that if we could know for positive it would never return.  We have really come to have peace with this thought and with the uncertainty.

 

In actuality, we have continue to learn how to just live one day at a time, taking each day as a gift.  My prayer is that we continue to live together with that mindset for many, many years to come.  Living this way helps me personally not get so “wrapped around the axle” on little things that used to really bother me.  One of my personal concerns on the far side of this experience is that I will lose that perspective and go back to old thought patterns.  It is easy to forget and I will need to continue to work at this mindset because my default setting is the opposite.

We continue to lean heavily on the Lord, knowing that HE is GOD and we are not!  He has a plan and holds us in his care.  He has continually met our needs in the very smallest of ways that are very tangible evidence of His watchful eye and love for us.

Thank you to all of you for your love and support as we walk this journey of faith together!  Let’s get on with the next steps!  Let her glow!